Saturday, March 11, 2017

New job and sun!

After two days, maybe three, of sun and the entire month of february without writing, today I felt like I needed to do it. In January I wrote a lot and then my brain blocked.
Life happened! In a brutal way again. So, I did a break, of being me, being strong although I dealed with strenght I guess. I was strong but I kinda blocked the emotions. I just went through it, later on I felt fragile but still blocking.
So, February I didn't do much and didn't write anything, I couldn't do it. I couldn't preach about how to make things feel better or how to enjoy life, make our days better if I didn't feel it, if I wasn't in shape. 
I write to organize my thoughts, to let things go out of me, to remember what I need to do, to teach myself, and to those of you who want to read.
But mostly I write because I feel the necessity of it and I know my English isn't perfect and this may afect my writing, but I'm trying to improve, I love to write in English although isn't my mother language.

Better news, I started a new job! A real one, ahah!

I'm no longer an unemployed person uhuh! I'ts a part-time job, cleaning Primark!
I let so many times my resume on that store to actually work with them, but I ended working for a cleaning company that works for Primark. I guess we can't have everything.
It doesn't mind that is part-time for now because it's a transition job until I can back to the kindergarten. And when that time comes I still want to work in this job on the weekends if possible.
It's just three hours a day so... I think I can handle it.
I'm very happy about it, I'm happy for having a job, the part that I have to wake up every morning at 5 a.m. not so much but I'm trying to not complain and adjust my brain that it is ok, I can do it, I already did it in my previous "real job" and it was a full time job, 8 hours a day, some days 9, so with 3 hours I must handle it.
For an entire year I started my job at 11 a.m. and finished at 7 p.m so my brain was used to that and now it is lazy.
I'm trying to  not get involved at any drama occur in that place, because honestly I just want to do my job the best way I can and come home. I don't want lose any mental stability that I've gained. It was hard to achieve my inner peace and I'm still struggling so I want to stay away of drama and problems. But it isn't easy because people being people, at any place that I go to work shit happens.
I just hope that doesn't envolve me ahah!

And for now I still have plenty of time in the rest of the day to do my things, to clean my house, to read, to write, to enjoy my free time. Life currently feels good, spring is coming, sunny hot days appear, yesterday was a very hot one, sun was bright, I was able to dry all my laundry outside, amazing!
Today is a rainy day with a grey sky, this is nature playing with us, first, yes you may feel like is a good day to keep away all your warm clothes and maybe go for a walk on the beach because tomorrow you will want to stay in bed with a warm blanket!
It's confusing!
But I'm glad, feeling the sun while I went home was very pleasant, although I was in zombie mood and warm as fuck with my wool sweater.
So, yeah I hope sunny days come really fast and frequently because I feel so much better when the sun shines!
Bye, be happy!

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