Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Trying to see life positively!

This past weeks I fell in a spiral of negativity.
I cry about everything, I try but I can't see any little light.
Although I give value to all the good things I have and surround me, I'm always hitting the same key, I only see the bad things , I suffer with anticipation about the future, I feel like I don't deserve anything, I don't see a hope in my future, I lost all my dreams again.
And my beloved as always played the role of my psychologist.
He let me cry, and talk and let it all out.

And then he told me:
"You have to learn to let it go, and let it flow. You focus only in the bad things that happen to you, you focus on the dream that you have, and you get frustrated.
Maybe that dream isn't what you need to be happy.
You need to give value to all the good things that you have, that you had conquer till now.
And you need to accept your life as it is, seeing the good things.
Like as, you don't like your job enjoy the money that allows you to have a house, food, clothes, and allows you to do your hobbys.
You can't live by your hobbys because you can't make money with them, but they make your life happier, enjoy that, enjoy the time that you can spend with them.
Your life isn't your job.
Embrace your life as it is, let it flow, enjoy your free time, make goals that you can achieve, not dreams that would make you feel frustrated.
Embrace every day of your life, take everything good that happen to you in that day and keep it with you, the bad things let them go.
Don't let them inside or you will continue to be destroyed."

As I have been sick and feeling like a piece of worthlessness I have not been able to put his advice into practice.
But I plan to do it as soon as possible, at least I want to try, again.
It's been so long that I don't feel happy, I'm always complain about everything.
I really want to change that. I know that I'm always gonna have my lows but I really want to feel alive even for a short period.
I want to feel the rush on my blood, I want to feel light as if I could fly.
I want to be more me as I want to be, and not as other person expect me to be.
I just hope to achieved this goal.
This is my first goal:
- To embrace my life, be thankful and happy.

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